My Heart Is Set On Thee

a song for The Beloved

From sunrise to slumber
My heart is set on Thee
In dreamscapes and wonder
I sense You here with me

In the ordinary moments
of extraordinary days
You reach through time
You breach this space
to help me find
sweet strands of Grace
which lead me to Your warm embrace~

My heart is set on Thee.

From dawning to fading
My heart is set on Thee
In watching and waiting
Yours is the Face I see

In the deepest, darkest valleys
on the highest mountain peaks
You call to me
The Secret Name
And kindle Love’s soft-dancing flame
Your arms encircling as a caim~

My heart is set on Thee.

From first-breath to dying
My heart is set on Thee
In laughter, in crying
You set my spirit free
In the joys and in the sorrows,
on that day with no tomorrows

You’re Everything
You’re Everywhere
You’ve been my spring
and summer fair
autumn chill and winter bare~

and so Beyond, You’ll find me There~
My heart still set on Thee.

~Cheryl Anne Maris 

Not long before receiving my recent diagnosis, I met with my pastor for conversation and spiritual direction. In the midst of a long term struggle with my sense of faith, spiritual identity, and connection with the church, I have attended services only sporadically. The political climate and its misuse and distortions of Christianity have played a large part in my struggle. In the nearly eight years since I first visited St. Mary's, Fr. Danny has been unwaveringly compassionate and understanding, and unconditionally accepting and welcoming as I have fumbled and floundered while carrying a heavy load of good intentions and hopes for homecoming. 
During this particular session, he suggested that I recall, revisit, and journal about my actual, personal spiritual experiences; to look at my personal spiritual encounters and experiences with the Eye of the Heart, instead of scrutinizing or brushing them off as "crazy"...a word I used to describe myself and my experience more than once in the course of that conversation; and have since consciously sought to rid myself of. 
This potent practice led me to revisiting poems, prayers and songs I have written over the course of my life, which have flowed from those spaces of spiritual encounter; the Unmistakable Presence of Love I have, for reasons beyond me, felt from the very beginning of my life. I realized that herein lies the repository of what is most real and true for me, and about me. I don't have to search or struggle for my identity. It's right here in my heart; if I will let myself simply *be*. 
This song is a re-minder of who I am and how I perceive life when I do not over examine everything and pathologize my inherent mystical inclinations. 
I'm deeply grateful for Fr. Danny's deep listening, kindness, and gentle guidance. I am also thankful for this space of recovery from surgery, and recovery of my soul; and for my homecoming in the sweet family that is St. Mary's. 
Peace, Love, and All Good to Everyone. <3